Strangers to the Desert

Clouds.  Thunder that woke me up earlier than normal.  Lightening that pierced the otherwise black sky and made me squint as I lazily stared from my bed out the eastern window.  We rarely get these things here.  I get excited when "weather" comes to the California High Desert as most days are blue skies.  This morning was beautiful as the sunrise got a shot of adrenaline courtesy of clouds.  Mornings have always been my favorite.  Most people are asleep, the animals are stirring, my energy is at its highest and it's very, very quiet.  I'm struggling what to write on this blog in light of what is happening in life these days.  Direction isn't as cut and dry.  I'm happy and I'm hopeful.  This is true.  I'm also sad and worried due to my partner's cancer.  Confusion can be at an all time high and deception may be hard at work when a person looks and feels so good but the doctors convey a different reality.  I really don't know if it's interesting for others, or even appropriate to write about such things on a blog.  At times I think of this blog as a journal, but then I have to remind myself there are others reading it.  Oh, yea!  Whoops, forgot!  Some days I think I should keep it full of my exciting mind and body tinkering like our plans to move to the Ozarks in Arkansas and building my chicken coop and the fact I'll soon be rushing home new chicken family members.  Then, I contemplate being a bit more real and talking about the possibility of plans being altered or even halted due to that crappy thing called cancer.  I don't know - what do you think?  Going out on a limb here.  Caught me at a weak moment - or is it a strong one?  Don't get me wrong - I'm smiling.  I'm grateful for every day I get to see the sun rise, have a job and live on my own piece of dirt.  I'm even happier when there's clouds, thunder and lightening.  Now, rain would just put me over the top!  That might be too much to ask for.